My Military Children

I much prefer to call them military children than that harsh "military brat" label they so often are called.  April is Month of the Military Child and I'm linking up with the fabulous Kate @ Daffodils today to talk about how being children of an Air Force pilot has influenced my kids.

I remember the conversation Brian and I had when we were first married. He was a newly commissioned 2nd Lieutenant and I was a new military wife and really had no clue what I was in for, as much as I thought I did.

We both knew that we wanted to have kids but I was really unsure about bringing up a child in a military family. "It would be so unfair to them. To be away from their grandparents, family, have to move tons of times, have to make new friends constantly, have their daddy leave for months at a time.  They wouldn't get to choose this lifestyle, rather be stuck with it." We both agreed how hard it would be so we kind of went into our marriage thinking we'd wait to have children until he was done with his commitment in 10 years.  But after a year into our marriage something inside of me changed. I truly believe it was God telling us to take that next step, to have children, and that he would take care of us on the way.

I saw other military families doing it, saw how well adjusted their kids were, and knew that we could do it.  

And then we were a family of 3.

Brian was home for the first 5 months of Brady's life, went on a 6 week TDY (temporary assignment), and then was home until he was 11 months old.

Brady in his ABU onesie

Saying goodbye for that first deployment...hardest thing ever.

Brian skyping in on Brady's 1st birthday party

I'm not going to lie and say it's been easy. Brian missed Brady learning to walk, missed his first birthday, holidays, and milestones.  I remember the first deployment taking Brady to the park and him just gravitating towards the other dads in the park. Broke my heart.

Seeing Daddy for the first time after his first deployment.

But Brady really knows no different. He knows that Daddy flies airplanes. Sometimes Daddy is home and sometimes Daddy leaves.  And even though he struggles with it at first, he is resilient. He knows that his daddy loves him more than anything and that sometimes daddy just needs to go away for a little while to do an important job.

Layla really doesn't know any different either.  She was born and 3 months later, Brian left on another deployment.  

Ummm who are you, strange man holding me?!

Waiting for daddy's plane to land

My daddy's home!

The 2 happiest children (and wife!) after Daddy got home from his latest deployment.

The thing I struggle with the most is having my kids not grow up with family nearby. We were so, so blessed to be in Nebraska for 4 years and only 6 hours away from family. But it's still not the same. With Skype and phone calls, we try to be as connected as possible but my kids are still missing out on time with extended family and that kills me a little. But that makes you draw that much closer to the military family around you. 

Part of our military family

My children, they're strong. They've dealt with a lot of changes in their short lives. And I think that these early tests in their lives are going to shape them beautifully for adulthood.  They've learned coping skills during deployments. They've learned trust and confidence. Brady has learned how to be a big brother and how to be there for his sister when she was feeling lonely. They've learned compassion. How when someone's daddy is deployed we have them over for dinner or we help them do things.  And the things they've seen and the places they've been for an almost 4 and almost 2 year old astound me.  They've been to 19 states already and I know that list will only grow. 

Both Brady and Layla were born in Nebraska, in the same hospital, heck, even the same hospital room and I often wonder if they'll associate with Nebraska being their home or where.  This is the first time they're experiencing moves and having to say goodbye to friends.  For now, they think it's exciting. A new place with new playgrounds and places to explore. I can only hope that their enthusiasm continues! :)  

Future pilot?

I have the utmost respect for our nation's military children.  They are the true heroes. They didn't sign up for this and they didn't choose this lifestyle but so many of them love the life they grew up with. And along with all of the hardships comes so many positives.   God Bless the military child.